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“Dave, I only suggested a movie. You buy a ticket, I buy a ticket, we sit down with popcorn and watch a motion picture.”“I know that!” he said...in exasperation. “It’s just that, well, I’ve never really...”“What, dated?” asked Nancy. Dave shrugged and nodded, and she stared at him. “Are you trying to tell me that you managed to get married and have two kids and never once dated your wife? That’s nuts!”“No, it’s just that, well ... Emily and I, we were, like, always meant to be. I mean, we always. ”A guy was playing golf one day and he got lost. He saw a lady up ahead of him and went to her and said “Can you please help me, I don’t know what hole I’m on.”She told him “You are one hole behind me. I’m on 7, you’re on 6.” He thanked her and continued playing golf.On the back nine he got lost again.He saw the same lady and went to her again kind of embarrassed. “I’m sorry to bother you again but I’m lost again, can you please tell me what hole I’m on.”She told him “You are one hole behind. This would be a rare treat but something that would definitely hold his attention for the remainder of the night. He ended up choosing a Red Riding Hood parody and was fascinated at how sexy the girl was who had been cast to play Little Red. He was fifteen minutes or so into it with his hand in his pants when he was startled by his daughter’s voice behind him.“That’s not a very convincing wolf,” Brenda laughed, and he jumped up, slipping his hand from his pants.“Shit, Bren! I thought you had. "It's a Halloween costume," she remarked."You wore THAT on Halloween? A nurse would wear a costume like that? I'm a purchasing agent, but I would never go as a sexy purchasing agent to a party." I've had this since before I became a nurse," she replied."Is it from your wild child days?" I asked."I guess you could say that. It served its purpose." Which was?" To get laid. I had the hots for a guy who never paid any attention to me." I'll bet that got his attention. It's too bad nurses don't.
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