.. so was I. As I shaved my legs in the tub, my mind was racing in overdrive. I've struggled with my overwhelming sexuality,... versus my morals,..... for many years now. My own sexual taboo fantasies are now staring me in the face,... but could I open that door,... was the question I now faced.Visions of the many captions I earlier created before this all began,... are providing the push I so need. Certainly this was something I never dreamt I'd be thinking about or even considering.. I didnt call her instantly, but i gave it a day or two. then i called her up one night. *ring* *ring* halfway trough the third ring someone answered hello? hi maam, my name is johnny. im looking for Julie, is she around? yeah, one second. when she found Julie, i heard her proclaim wow! not even a month and you already got boys calling the house at all hours of the night. then i heard Julie whine mom! hello? she asked. hey Julie, its johnny. i said. oh, i was wondering when you would call.. You might think modeling for an artist would be the most boring job in the universe but it depends on the artist. With Henry it is rarely dull -- after all, he is a blind sculptor and I'm usually nude. But even allowing for his tactile methods I had plenty of time to think and for some reason today I had a lot to think about. Once he had me the way he wanted me -- think Goya's The Naked Maja, one of Henry's favorites for a beginning class -- I found my mind going back to the SACNISP meeting the. Dustin starts with, “We're still trying to maybe link the dreams to the three times you actually died on the table Matthew. You think you can remember any traumatic events in the dreams—that maybe would interpret the real world of you dying”? I sit and think for a moment, then taking a swig of my beer, softly respond, “Ya—I think so”.I described that prolly Maurice being killed in the final game of my Senior year in football, that's prolly when I died in my dreams. Everyone shook their heads.
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